Processes

Mother and Father energy and essence
came together to provide the portal
through which she would come...
A destiny predestined, she found her willing
but oblivious hosts
Her soul's answer, lessons, camp, training
would be with J and T, mother and father
Their lust, love and chaos created the fertile ground
for new but old life to spring forth and be resurrected again
Their strife forces this new life within
Coding revealed...she remembers and continues the process
to heal
The sins of the father burdened on her shoulders
she sees victims and victimizers and chooses her place between
Surrendering to the pain
Her emotional house decides that no one else
can live within her
no more feeling unless it's laced in plea...sure, pleasure
she gives up and becomes numb, a new resident
pleasure is no longer recognized
anger and hurt morphed in to fear
they, numb and fear, form a relationship
they cohabitat and make new life forms...creations, illusions
The soul still residing in upper levels throughout the dome, mind
Was always assured, soul never panicked...
Things were right on course, moving according to plan
She began to sense soul within her
Feeling that she could no longer ignore
souls ways and means
she sat with soul
and realized that another inhabited her space
besides numb & the morphed twins, anger and hurt that had become fear
Soul began to place at her feet gifts each time they would meet
One day soul brought light
Another day a bone with the first mother's dna
Soul brought seeds, air and water
more water than she could receive
the gifts kept coming
and one day she asked, 'why, why have U bestowed all these gifts upon me?'
Soul replied, "I am returning what is yours.
Fear and numb blurred your vision, dulled your senses
I bring to your feet what U already have here...just some of what is
yours. I have been upstairs yet to my quarters, dome/mind."
As she received her gifts feeling began to revisit her again.
She speaks to her pain...she actually realized she was a healer...
that message came from the bones, memory.
She heals herself...process
She feels now...access
She feels
She is alive...redress
and although she hurts
her feeling puts her back in touch with soul, who carries memory
on her back
she struggles at times with those in her house
but these are her processes of being a self in relationship with
feeling and soul, mothers and movers
she continues her journey

© 2004 Blackgold347