Blogging Katrina
I've been blogging Katrina every since I saw Hardy (Harvey) Jackson of Mississippi on the news on Monday, August 29, 2005. My heart sank as he stood there, dazed, trying to tell the reporter what had happened to his home and his wife. In an instant he was separated from, and lost, both. I cry fairly easily on a normal day. My heart's soft. It's easy for me to shed a few tears especially when the event/occasion is a good one ie. graduations, weddings, births. To see Hardy Jackson standing there attempting to tell the reporter how his wife gave him instructions to take care of the children and the grandchildren before her hand slipped from his -crushed me. I saw more footage of the devastating effects of Katrina in the gulf region. 'Whew!', I thought...I had heard the numerous reports of what could happen if New Orleans flooded. It could have been a city lost, like a modern day Atlantis. New Orleans had been spared.
I didn't think that things along the gulf coast could get any worse. I saw Mr. Hardy Jackson. Through the television screen I felt his pain. I saw the casinos that we drove past along the gulf coast demolished. I wondered to myself, 'Did they get all that money out in time? What did they do with it?'' The coast of Mississippi and Alabama looked giant tooth picks or popsicle sticks were tossed down along the shore from heaven. Katrina came and went. Those of us not directly impacted see the damage on television, and we move on with our lives. For those affected directly, it's Time to rebuild...
The media coverage of hurricanes is usually the same- reporters go to or near where ever they predict the eye of the storm will hit, you see them blowing in the wind dodging flying debris...you flip through the channels thinking about how stupid the reporters are for being out there after the residents were advised to leave.
Not Katrina.
I heard about the flooding in New Orleans. The levees broke early in the morning. I had heard that there was a levee breach during one of the many press conferences held by Governor Blanco, Mayor Nagin, and Senator Mary Landrieu. I didn't watch the first couple with my full attention. I had to go to work. So, I got snippets here and there. I remember seeing Senator Landrieu looking worried during the press conference. I didn't know she was a Senator at the time. I thought that maybe she was with FEMA or another federal agency. The were reporting that New Orleans had flooded. I remember feeling very torn about buying baby shower gifts for coworkers. I felt that my money could be better used by the residents of Gulf region. I purchased them anyone because it was the polite thing to do, but it still didn't sit right with me. I had thought about donating the monies I would spend on gifts for their children in their child's name. It remained a thought.
I went to work, and work felt different because my mind often wondered what was happening to the folks in New Orleans. I hadn't seen any news coverage because I was at work. No time on the Internet because I was doing the babyshower thing. On the way home, I listened to some of Michael Basden's radio show. I remember hearing him say that he spoke to someone from the region on the telephone. He said that it was "pretty bad" done there. I heard him say that "Bodies are floating" in the water. 'Oh my God!' was my immediate thought. 'Is it that bad?' This was beyond my comprehension... I had heard about Atlantis...the possibility of New Orleans flooding, but I thought she was in the clear.
I turned on the television immediately. I saw footage of people standing on rooftops, helicopters hovering over the homes as people tried to situate themselves into and onto tiny baskets. The boats, the air mattresses...people wading through the waters in some areas. Thinking about it...the time line is not as clear because all of the images start to run together. Emotions immediately grabbed me.
They were taking people to the Superdome, where others who didn't evacuate initially were sent to wait out Hurricane Katrina instead of remaining home. I didn't realize so many people did not evacuate or go to the Superdome until I saw the throngs of people trying to get to the Superdome, and then the Convention Center.
I saw reports of looting. I thought nothing of it because I thought that in a situation such as this it was expected. I've seen it many times in situations where emotions are high and chaos ensues. Defending it? No. But not every one was doing what I would label "looting". Some people, probably most people were trying to survive. Again, I thought little of it... The look of pain and horror on many of the faces. Hearing of mothers not being able to breastfeed because they had no food or water in them to make milk, or babies being born and dying almost as soon as they are born. Or, reports of rape and killings. I didn't think this far ahead. What happens when the infrastructure of a United States city collapses? What happens to the ill physically, the poor, the mentally ill, the prisoners, the drug addicts, the school-aged children, the new borns, the mothers, the fathers, the preachers, the teachers, fed-ex woman or man, the man who parks the car at the hotel, the woman who cleans the hotel room, the nursing assistant, the nurse, the dog, the cat, the roaches, the trash pickup, the air conditioner, the nanny, the grandmother, the patient, the therapist, the client, the dentist, the pharmacist...? NEW ORLEANS IS WHAT HAPPENS.
As days passed, I grew angry because I heard reports of aid coming in from other countries. Countries, some so poor...it was like your grandmother giving you a $1 to help out with the down payment for a $500,000 house. It's the gesture. I saw the news ticker scrolling on CNN. Putin offers condolences and aid from Russia, and we haven't heard from the President of the United States yet. I did see news coverage of him speaking in San Diego. I thought to myself 'I can't believe this guy!' People are suffering, dying in deplorable conditions, and he is carrying on with business as usual.
I identified immediately with the victims whose faces were overwhelming the faces of people of African descent. It hurt to see their suffering. It hurt deep...So, deep that it felt weird. At some point I realized that I was disoriented, confused...I didn't feel right. I felt bad. I felt awful. I was sad, sick. My appetite left. I required less sleep. I wanted to see what was happening before bed and after waking up early. I tossed and turned in my sleep. This went on for several days, two weeks in different degrees. My energy was zapped.
'Why is this happening?', I wondered. Certainly, America has the capability to rescue those people, my people,...my family. Why wasn't this a priority to the federal government? Why isn't Bush or Cheney doing or saying anything? I, like many in the world, wished that I could go down and help in some way. Build a human bridge if we have to! IT'S AN EMERGENCY! Why doesn't the federal government do something? People crying for help, chanting for help. My heart almost broke in quarters when I saw a black man say "There are white people here too!" He told the camera man to show the white person. Many people know that in America a white life has historically been "worth" more than a black life. We've seen it. We've felt it. We've lived it. There was/is no doubt in my mind that America could do more if America wanted to.
So, why didn't America want to do more sooner? My gut says that the crime element was blown so far out of proportion that white people (FEMA, RED CROSS, neighboring parishes) were afraid. It is so easy to think negatively about black people. That is why the stories of crime were magnified above preserving, saving human life. I refuse to believe that it was red tape that got in the way of saving lives in New Orleans. Why? Because of the Patriot Act. America, our federal government can arrest and detain people without probable cause. They only have to suspect that someone will harm or threaten national security. Can't we save the lives of American citizens if we know their lives are in danger? Images from New Orleans reminded many of images from some so called third world country, but not America. Is that how the government disconnected it self from fellow Americans? Are fellow Americans only white and the black Americans have some other status? Historically, yes, that has been the case in America. Black people in America have had to die to get similar rights as white people in America.
I do not require confirmation or validation from anyone to know that racism exists in America. I know with every fiber of my being that blacks and whites do not receive equal treatment in America. That realization is not about victimhood for me. It's just reality. It's real. I live it everyday. Racism is not the only "-ism" in America and the world. I understand how white people can believe that race was not a factor in the governments slow response. And, I understand why I, and many other black people believe that it was. We have had different historical experiences in America. We have differing day to day experiences. You can't speak for me if you haven't walked in my shoes (and vice versa). Although, black people have much more experience when it comes to extending themselves; stepping outside of our ways and norms simply exist in America. Our lives depended on it for generations.
Katrina's aftermath in New Orleans opened a deep wound, an ancestral wound, in me. The wound didn't open after someone suggested to me that race could be a factor in the federal governments inadequate and slow response to the catastrophe that became a tragedy. Not Jesse or Al or Farrakhan or the Congressional Black Caucus embedded that feeling in me (they didn't have enough air time for that to even be remotely possible). America, her legacy, I know...
(To be continued...)
I didn't think that things along the gulf coast could get any worse. I saw Mr. Hardy Jackson. Through the television screen I felt his pain. I saw the casinos that we drove past along the gulf coast demolished. I wondered to myself, 'Did they get all that money out in time? What did they do with it?'' The coast of Mississippi and Alabama looked giant tooth picks or popsicle sticks were tossed down along the shore from heaven. Katrina came and went. Those of us not directly impacted see the damage on television, and we move on with our lives. For those affected directly, it's Time to rebuild...
The media coverage of hurricanes is usually the same- reporters go to or near where ever they predict the eye of the storm will hit, you see them blowing in the wind dodging flying debris...you flip through the channels thinking about how stupid the reporters are for being out there after the residents were advised to leave.
Not Katrina.
I heard about the flooding in New Orleans. The levees broke early in the morning. I had heard that there was a levee breach during one of the many press conferences held by Governor Blanco, Mayor Nagin, and Senator Mary Landrieu. I didn't watch the first couple with my full attention. I had to go to work. So, I got snippets here and there. I remember seeing Senator Landrieu looking worried during the press conference. I didn't know she was a Senator at the time. I thought that maybe she was with FEMA or another federal agency. The were reporting that New Orleans had flooded. I remember feeling very torn about buying baby shower gifts for coworkers. I felt that my money could be better used by the residents of Gulf region. I purchased them anyone because it was the polite thing to do, but it still didn't sit right with me. I had thought about donating the monies I would spend on gifts for their children in their child's name. It remained a thought.
I went to work, and work felt different because my mind often wondered what was happening to the folks in New Orleans. I hadn't seen any news coverage because I was at work. No time on the Internet because I was doing the babyshower thing. On the way home, I listened to some of Michael Basden's radio show. I remember hearing him say that he spoke to someone from the region on the telephone. He said that it was "pretty bad" done there. I heard him say that "Bodies are floating" in the water. 'Oh my God!' was my immediate thought. 'Is it that bad?' This was beyond my comprehension... I had heard about Atlantis...the possibility of New Orleans flooding, but I thought she was in the clear.
I turned on the television immediately. I saw footage of people standing on rooftops, helicopters hovering over the homes as people tried to situate themselves into and onto tiny baskets. The boats, the air mattresses...people wading through the waters in some areas. Thinking about it...the time line is not as clear because all of the images start to run together. Emotions immediately grabbed me.
They were taking people to the Superdome, where others who didn't evacuate initially were sent to wait out Hurricane Katrina instead of remaining home. I didn't realize so many people did not evacuate or go to the Superdome until I saw the throngs of people trying to get to the Superdome, and then the Convention Center.
I saw reports of looting. I thought nothing of it because I thought that in a situation such as this it was expected. I've seen it many times in situations where emotions are high and chaos ensues. Defending it? No. But not every one was doing what I would label "looting". Some people, probably most people were trying to survive. Again, I thought little of it... The look of pain and horror on many of the faces. Hearing of mothers not being able to breastfeed because they had no food or water in them to make milk, or babies being born and dying almost as soon as they are born. Or, reports of rape and killings. I didn't think this far ahead. What happens when the infrastructure of a United States city collapses? What happens to the ill physically, the poor, the mentally ill, the prisoners, the drug addicts, the school-aged children, the new borns, the mothers, the fathers, the preachers, the teachers, fed-ex woman or man, the man who parks the car at the hotel, the woman who cleans the hotel room, the nursing assistant, the nurse, the dog, the cat, the roaches, the trash pickup, the air conditioner, the nanny, the grandmother, the patient, the therapist, the client, the dentist, the pharmacist...? NEW ORLEANS IS WHAT HAPPENS.
As days passed, I grew angry because I heard reports of aid coming in from other countries. Countries, some so poor...it was like your grandmother giving you a $1 to help out with the down payment for a $500,000 house. It's the gesture. I saw the news ticker scrolling on CNN. Putin offers condolences and aid from Russia, and we haven't heard from the President of the United States yet. I did see news coverage of him speaking in San Diego. I thought to myself 'I can't believe this guy!' People are suffering, dying in deplorable conditions, and he is carrying on with business as usual.
I identified immediately with the victims whose faces were overwhelming the faces of people of African descent. It hurt to see their suffering. It hurt deep...So, deep that it felt weird. At some point I realized that I was disoriented, confused...I didn't feel right. I felt bad. I felt awful. I was sad, sick. My appetite left. I required less sleep. I wanted to see what was happening before bed and after waking up early. I tossed and turned in my sleep. This went on for several days, two weeks in different degrees. My energy was zapped.
'Why is this happening?', I wondered. Certainly, America has the capability to rescue those people, my people,...my family. Why wasn't this a priority to the federal government? Why isn't Bush or Cheney doing or saying anything? I, like many in the world, wished that I could go down and help in some way. Build a human bridge if we have to! IT'S AN EMERGENCY! Why doesn't the federal government do something? People crying for help, chanting for help. My heart almost broke in quarters when I saw a black man say "There are white people here too!" He told the camera man to show the white person. Many people know that in America a white life has historically been "worth" more than a black life. We've seen it. We've felt it. We've lived it. There was/is no doubt in my mind that America could do more if America wanted to.
So, why didn't America want to do more sooner? My gut says that the crime element was blown so far out of proportion that white people (FEMA, RED CROSS, neighboring parishes) were afraid. It is so easy to think negatively about black people. That is why the stories of crime were magnified above preserving, saving human life. I refuse to believe that it was red tape that got in the way of saving lives in New Orleans. Why? Because of the Patriot Act. America, our federal government can arrest and detain people without probable cause. They only have to suspect that someone will harm or threaten national security. Can't we save the lives of American citizens if we know their lives are in danger? Images from New Orleans reminded many of images from some so called third world country, but not America. Is that how the government disconnected it self from fellow Americans? Are fellow Americans only white and the black Americans have some other status? Historically, yes, that has been the case in America. Black people in America have had to die to get similar rights as white people in America.
I do not require confirmation or validation from anyone to know that racism exists in America. I know with every fiber of my being that blacks and whites do not receive equal treatment in America. That realization is not about victimhood for me. It's just reality. It's real. I live it everyday. Racism is not the only "-ism" in America and the world. I understand how white people can believe that race was not a factor in the governments slow response. And, I understand why I, and many other black people believe that it was. We have had different historical experiences in America. We have differing day to day experiences. You can't speak for me if you haven't walked in my shoes (and vice versa). Although, black people have much more experience when it comes to extending themselves; stepping outside of our ways and norms simply exist in America. Our lives depended on it for generations.
Katrina's aftermath in New Orleans opened a deep wound, an ancestral wound, in me. The wound didn't open after someone suggested to me that race could be a factor in the federal governments inadequate and slow response to the catastrophe that became a tragedy. Not Jesse or Al or Farrakhan or the Congressional Black Caucus embedded that feeling in me (they didn't have enough air time for that to even be remotely possible). America, her legacy, I know...
(To be continued...)
posted by Blackgold at 9:44 AM
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